An Example of a Subtle, but Powerful Emotional Abuse

The following statement was the first part of a message written by my sister to our younger brother, whom I will refer to as M. And my sister also texted a copy of it to me.)

"[M], I must tell you that Dad cried his heart out after he got off the phone from you, because he saw right through it and he saw exactly who and what you are. And it broke his heart..."

1. The parts of this statement which say, "Dad cried his heart out" and "it broke his heart" are exaggerated (or possibly completely fabricated) just to make my brother feel guilty. Its a mean guilt trip. Since my father is not an emotional type of person, it is doubtful that he even cried at all, especially not in front of them. But if he did, his heart was surely not "broken" to that degree, no matter what happened in the conversation with my brother. And I know that my brother was actually on his best behavior and did nothing horrible during that conversation... So, this part of this statement was definitely an intentionally mean guilt trip.

2. The part that says "he saw right through it and he saw exactly who and what you are," is the equivalent of saying 'You are a rotten person and your father thinks you are a rotten person.' This is one of the more subtle forms of BOTH of my sister's life long habits of trying to convince the rest of us that our parents do not love us and do not approve of us, which is VERY abusive. This is also a manipulative attempt to sabotage the relationship between my father and brother; The normal reaction to this sort of statement would be for my brother to feel hurt and betrayed by our father; hurt because his own father thinks so badly of him that he would be "crying his heart out,"... and betrayed because it implies that his father was bashing him with our sisters, instead of talking to him about a problem between them.
   This statement is also emotional abuse, because it intentionally inflicts emotional pain; inside most people is a yearning to be loved and approved of by our parents, and when we are convinced that our father or mother do not love us or do not approve of us, it DEEPLY hurts us in ways that have life-long ill effects.

3. The fact that the message was also texted to me, shows a VERY obvious attempt to make me think badly of my brother. I told them that I did not want to receive their attacks against my bother or anyone else and slammed a door in their face...and rightfully so.

Sadly, most victims of this sort of abuse believe things that people like my sister's say, because its hard for an honest and caring person to even fathom anyone performing such deceitful and cruel manipulations or such mean aims to inflict emotional pain. We often do not realize what is being done to us and our relationships until some kind and aware person points it out to us.
   Subtle forms of abuse actually have a worse impact than the blatantly obvious forms; We can more easily blow off someone angrily degrading us, because our defenses go up in the face of obvious attacks. But calm and subtle manipulative attacks like these tend to cut much deeper, because they hit us when our guards are down, and because we often do not even realize that we are being manipulated by someone who has ill intentions. Subtle manipulative verbal abuse is far more hurtful than blatantly obvious abuse, and it can be devastatingly harmful when the aim is to sabotage relationships between parents and children.

A Final Message and an Accident

 I hit a solid wall with my aims to help my father be returned to his home and have kind and neutral help there for him. Yesterday I woke with a steady flow of silent tears. It felt like my soul was deeply grieving. And then I decided that I had to shut the door on this whole family situation, for the sake of my own health and wellbeing. So, I blocked the cell phone, that my sister and her daughter are harassing me on, and let other people know that I am taking some time to myself. But then my sister or her daughter sent yet another harassing text, which was a little crying face, and I realized that they were not blocked. But I figured out my mistake and blocked them. And I decided to send them one final message, because I sensed that they are happily celebrating their win. My final message to them was… 

“You may think you beat me, but what you really beat was an old man’s wish to be in his own home and his psychological needs…etc. I don’t know how you live with yourselves. I promise that the world will know the truth now, names and all.”

My sister has been saying that I tell “the world,” about them, but I haven’t been. I have been withholding my sister’s names and my family name out of consideration for them on this blog. But they have still been trying to threaten me into silence.
   For the first time in my life I have been standing up against my sister's abuse, both inside my family and on this blog, in the past couple years. People should be able to fully stand up against ongoing abuse, with the whole truth including the names of the abusers, because THERE WOULD BE A LOT LESS ABUSE IN OUR WORLD IF THE ABUSERS WERE MORE WORRIED ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE FINDING OUT ABOUT WHAT THEY DO, AND IF THERE WERE LAWS THAT CAN BE ENFORCED TO STOP THE ABUSERS FROM CONTINUING TO HURT PEOPLE. But nowadays victims who stand up and publicly tell the truth are apt to be viewed (and possibly even prosecuted) as the one who is wrong, due to there being so many abusers who publicly lie about their victims, like my sister has done to me, and also due to the abusers claiming that their victims are the ones who are lieing, like my sisters do to me.

Victims, like myself, have too often gotten hit with lies and even more abuse when we openly tell the truth. And this has to change.

I am probably not going to publicly share my sister's names, because they are apt to seek vengeance and I really can't handle anymore of their manipulative hate right now. I really need to completely close the door on their abuse and not let anymore of it into my life, ever again.
   Its been hell opening that door to them and their abusive children, in order to stand up for my father in my family, but now its time to close it, because there is nothing more I can do for my father... and I matter too. I have been separate from my family of origin through most of my adult life, due to the targeting of me inside the family. Its not a safe or healthy place for me. I wish so much that it were, but its not. And its gotten worse, instead of better, since 2003. 

We need laws to protect people from emotional and mental abuse and sadistic manipulations, because these things can hurt people in worse ways than most physical abuses. So, I am definitely going to publicly share more of my own experiences, and things that I've witnessed happening to other people, with the hope that it will help our judicial system to create new laws for victims of these sorts of crimes, especially for vulnerable children and elderly people.


The Accident

Shortly after I sent that final text message to my sister and her daughter, I drove through an intersection where a serious vehicle accident had just happened. If I had not delayed for something, I would have reached that intersection just about exactly when the accident happened. This sort of thing has happened, at strategic times, too much to be a coincidence every time. I suspect that at least some of these accidents are caused by blasts of microwaves effecting the drivers or their vehicles.
   These “accidents” remind me of what my second oldest sister wrote about me on a website when she was slandering me in 2005. She wrote, “Disasters happen everywhere she goes, because she is evil.” The truth is that the vehicle “accidents” seem to sometimes happen because I am being targeted by evil forces, who use microwave weapons. And the evil forces have been targeting me, both inside and outside my family, because I am good.

New Twist in my Father’s Situation

My father has been wanting go back home for OVER six weeks now, since at least March 8th, when he told me that he will be home "as soon as possible." In my sister's recent email the headline reads, "Dad's not going to be returned until issues get resolved..." Now, she is holding him hostage, until the "issues," which she has been and still is creating, get resolved. The past issues cannot be resolved due to her denial of her own problems with fabricating things and projecting her problems onto me...etc. And the current ones cannot be resolved due to her and her daughter's ongoing manipulations, fabrications, false accusations, insults and projections of their own abusive behaviors...etc.

My father wants to return home and they do not want him to and it appears that they are still raising hell in the family, in order to use it as an excuse to keep him isolated in Ohio.

My heart aches for my father. Even though things, that my sister recently manipulated him into doing against me, upset and hurt me a LOT, I do not blame him, because I know its due to what they are doing to him. In the past week, my heart has wanted to write him a letter just to tell him how much I love him and that I forgive him, but my sister gets his mail and I am concerned that she may replace it with something she has fabricated just to hurt him even more and turn him against me even more than she already has. She has done this sort of thing in the past, through fabricating emails that she pretended were from me. There is also a danger of the wrath in both of my sisters being triggered if my father gets my love in a letter and responds to it in kind, because they do not want us to even have a relationship, let alone a loving one. Love between my parents and the rest of us children has always triggered their jealous hatred. And my father should not be hurt anymore. He has already been hurt too much. I fear that my sister and her daughter have already traumatized my father so much, since they took him to Ohio, that he may never recover. I hope he returns home soon, so that I can send him my love without any sort of interference or problems arising from it.

I pray that she does not continue holding him hostage. He wants to be home and he should have been returned to his home LONG BEFORE NOW. The longer she keeps him in Ohio, raising discord, the more she is destroying him psychologically. Please help pray for him to be set free.

I suspect that my sister was just recently informed that I had sent reports to the Sheriff department in Ohio, because she is now suddenly trying to find things in my writings that she can used against me in the judicial system. And she appears to have relaunched her aim to prove me insane. I gave her an ultimatum; bring our father back home or I will take the final steps in that direction.
   She or her daughter sent me a picture through my father's cell phone yesterday; the pic was of the acknowledgement page of one of my books. And next to where I thanked God for giving me the courage to write the book, they had written, "Voices in the head." I laughed at this one, even though I am so distressed about the whole situation, because them trying to twist my belief in God as insanity and "voices" in my head is so ridiculous that it just makes them look bad.
   This has been one of my sister's tactics since 2003; she convinced the family that I was "insane" and then basically told me that if I do not shut up and stay away from the family she is going to have the whole family imprison me in an institution. BOTH of my sisters have so much control in the family that they may even still be able to accomplish this. BUT I have learned, in recent years, that no matter what they fabricate about me, they can not force me into an institution unless they can prove that I am a danger to myself or other people. So, all I have to do is continue keeping my distance from the family, and continue not having verbal conversations that can enable them to fabricate things.
  That "voices in the head" picture was sent as I pulled into the parking lot of my post office, to mail new evidence to the Sheriff in Ohio. Coincidence?

P.S. I have been sensing a danger in my sister's daughter. I think she has become dark as hell, which does not surprise me, because her heart was very blocked when she was a young child, and she was raised by my sister and the unhealthy men she had been with back then.

Another Brake Loss on my Vehicle

On April 8th 2023, a brake line on my car suddenly started VERY rapidly leaking brake fluid as I pulled out of a parking lot where it had been parked. I cannot prove to you that it was due to intentional damage done to my car, because the mechanic did not determine if it was or wasn't. But this appears to be the case. This happened right after I'd shared this blog on YouTube, in comments on news articles and in comments on Trump's new video for two days in a row. 
    Donald Trump's behaviors are like my sister's in the way of projecting his own manipulations, ill intentions and dishonesty onto other people, instead of facing and altering his own abusive behaviors. And I have been so sick of the hell, that their behaviors create in my family and in our country, that I firmly stood up without thinking of the ramifications for me. I knew there was a danger in standing up, especially against Trump, because I'd sensed it as I shared this blog. But I didn't expect life threatening damage to my car.
   However, I do not regret my stand and I am not going to erase this blog, because more people should be standing up for PEACE in a UNITED AMERICA. Please share the contents of this blog with as many people as you can.

For Peace in America

https://forpeaceinamerica.blogspot.com

I'm Still Standing...

 I just noticed that my sisters and their followers had also attacked me on my blog last May, as they sabotaged the family meeting and both my older brother and I's relationships with our father. And they just recently did it again. They left about twenty comments on my blog.

   The comments did not go up on my blog, because I have it set up so that I have to approve them before they do. I did not open any of them, but the visible parts made it obvious that they were the usual crude and demeaning bashings and projections of their own abusive behaviors - mind games - blaming me for what they have done...etc.
   I am not putting them up onto my blog, as comments, because I am not going to let them contaminate my life, or negatively influence others in my life, anymore than they already have. And they already have intentionally done WAY too much of this throughout my whole life.

I would never go onto their blog or their website or their face-book accounts, to even just honestly stand up against them, and I deserve the same consideration. I have not even shared their names as I stand up against their abusive behaviors on this blog. But they obviously are not capable of having this sort of consideration for me. And what they do to me is not even an honest stand - its abuse and mind games and attempts to manipulation other people against me... and the content of their comments prove this.

I dedicate the following song to my sisters and all who go along with them. Most of it is a good depiction of what I have been saying to them and still am saying to them... "There's not enough rope to tie me down... there's not enough tape to shut this mouth... I fight because I have to... I fight for us to know the truth... The stones you throw can make me bleed. But I won't stop until we're free... this wild heart can't be broken... there is a victory here..."

The "victory," in my situation with my sisters, is that I did not let them completely get rid of me, and then I stood up against their abusive and manipulative behaviors in my family... and then I did not back down as they attacked me for it, and I also stood strong inside myself - through their hateful attacks and twisted mind games - I did not let them make me doubt the truth or my own sanity, for even a second, and this was an important victory for me and my process of personal growth.
   This whole song fits the way I have been feeling as I finally confront my sister's abusive behaviors for the first time in my life. The part where Pink holds a child and sings, "This is a battle I must win. To want my share is not a sin" really touched my heart because it symbolizes me not letting them completely destroy my relationships with my own children, which they had both tried VERY hard to do. But they did not succeed. I hope my sisters, and all who go along with them, find their hearts.

If my sisters want me to stop writing about what they are doing to me, they are going to have to stop doing it...

"This is my rally cry... The stones you throw can make me bleed. But I won't stop until we're free..."

Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken, by Alecia Moore and Mike Busbee. Sung by Pink

https://youtu.be/OL4LNg-iyY4

Microwave Brainwashing Supports Trump

It appears that in the past few days there have been microwave brainwashings to make people support Trump. I noticed it happening to me. I am fairly certain this is what it was, because every fiber of my heart and soul has been against Trump from the very start of his first run for presidency. The brainwashing was not very effective on me, because I do not take any of the brain and feeling numbing pharmaceuticals and am more connected to my heart than the norm. But it did make me second guess some of the things I was writing yesterday, which are in the first post I put up today. And, after I saw the threats Trump posted in his social media forum, there is absolutely no way that I would have been second guessing myself and thinking that Trump is good. I finished the post in the middle of the night, when the brainwashings were not happening. But what about the rest of America? Was it only happening to me or was it mass brainwashings that were spread across the country?

Please also read this post;

https://sharonrosepoet.blogspot.com/2023/04/for-safety-of-america.html

IT IS HORRIBLE THAT MY LETTER TO MY FATHER COULD NOT BE PRIVATE

For those who may want to make me look bad for posting a letter to my father on this blog; I did not use his name, and my name change prevents the public from knowing who my family is, and this is a new blog that has not been advertised...so nothing I post here on this one is really very public, right now. I did not plan to keep the letter up, because it was all just another one of my foolish fantasies....that some kind person would print it out and send it to my father...and my father would just happen to get it at a time when he could privately read it and process it and respond to it with his heart. It was foolish of me - utterly foolish to think that this could happen under the current conditions.

I FEEL THAT A LETTER TO MY FATHER SHOULD BE TOTALLY PRIVATE - JUST BETWEEN MY FATHER AND I, BUT THIS IS LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE IN THIS SITUATION, BECAUSE MY SISTERS MONITER AND CONTROL ALL OF MY FATHER'S COMMUNICATIONS.

My father now has absolutely no private communications with anyone outside of my sister's household. So, my letter could not be private, no matter how I'd sent it, and this is why I posted it, aside from the fact that posting it here could prevent my sister from swapping it with one of her cruel fabrications designed to hurt him and make him lash out at me, like she has done in the past.

IT IS HORRIBLE THAT I CAN NOT HAVE ANY SORT OF PRIVATE COMMUNICATION WITH MY FATHER...AND THAT MY FATHER CAN NOT HAVE ANY PRIVATE COMMUNICATION WITH ANYONE OUTSIDE OF MY SISTER'S HOME. ITS JUST TOO INTRUSIVE AND WRONG.

I know that my father will most likely never get the letter, but I had to write it and post it, in order to be done with it, because I have been feeling desperate to end this hell and make things better between him and I. Writing it helped me to release some of my pain and posting it helped me to feel like I was doing something to help protect myself from being hurt even more. But it will probably not do any good aside from this, because, even if my father gets it, and even IF he was free to privately read and process and respond to it, he probably would not be receptive to it, because he has been so brainwashed against me. I was going to take the letter down and accept the fact that the new extension of the pain filled wall, which my sisters recently built between my father and I, will have to remain there even longer... and possibly for the rest of his life if he does not really return home and get neutral and considerate help there for him...etc. :-( But I decided to keep it up at least until I am in a better place to make a decision. I am VERY overwhelmed. Other stuff is a bit of a distraction for me right now, but not a positive one....everywhere I look hell is happening and its just too much. I need and want PEACE in ALL arenas. But I feel darkness brewing, in various places, and I just can't shake it. However there is Light in the REAL Truth and standing up with it can help. I'm still standing.

P.S. I had some concern that my letter may be too overwhelming for my father right now, but decided that he just does not have to read it, or be presented with it, if it is too much for him to handle right now. It was up to the discretion of him and people who show him things. I actually think that my father is functioning a LOT better than my sisters portrayed when they were trying to justify taking him out of his own home and isolating him in Ohio. And I think that he probably had lost private communication long before they took him there; I think he lost it when my sisters forced a new phone and TV upon him, even though he did not need or want them and even though it confused him and created hardship for him.

P.S.S. As for my last stand in my family; it started out being a stand for my father. Then it became my defense against the attacks on me. Overall, I went from one extreme to the opposite extreme; from way too much silence to the complete opposite - going for the jugular (so to speak) - relentlessly blasting out the truth after every attack against me, instead of letting them make me back down and shut up. I am not sorry, even though I know I went overboard, because I was honest and truly was never being "hateful" or "mean" like they said I was. I was blatantly honest and direct, because this is just the way I sometimes am... and I am not going to change. Perhaps it had to happen this way, because it naturally did. Sometimes people need to get blasted - slammed up against a wall so to speak. Sometimes it is the best thing to do. But now that is over and in the future I will probably settle into a heathier middle ground. But I have no intentions of reopening that door to my sisters soon, if ever. I see no positive change in them and this makes it a dead end street. I still must stay away from them for the sake of my safety and wellbeing. And it appears that there is nothing more I can do to make things better for my father. Time will tell what they do and if my stand helped him at all. There appears to be nothing I can do in the judicial system either, because i tried that too and two police departments told me that there was nothing they can do with the info I gave them, which is understandable, because this is an unusual situation that is hard to prove. There are no provable physical crimes. Its time for me to let it go, but I am still standing up with the truth. The following song is a good depiction of what I have been saying to my sisters.

Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken

https://youtu.be/OL4LNg-iyY4

P.S. But my heart still aches for my father and their last destruction of what little was left of our relationship last may. Hopefully our relationship can improve and time will tell if he even wants it to.

P.S.S. I did remove the letter to my father from this blog. It didn't feel right to make it public either.